If we lived life up high

Time moves slowest here on earth
If we lived on a mountain top 
or in the cabin of an airplane
perpetually floating through oblivion
this day would have come and gone - 
maybe weeks ago.

But as it is, 10 years have now passed
since the day I walked into the hospital circle doors,
looked up at the bricks and the windows reflecting sun,
and little did I realize
She would go in
and would not come out.

It's a warning I issue to every new mother
not in a spirit of foreboding
but one of birth and rebirth and rebirth
this neverending cycle of what life is
and can be
the lesson - so valuable - which you often teach me.

Your heart is deep and cavernous
so much that I never knew
how cold or closed off mine could be
and your capacity to see new possibilities
I find myself always learning something new.

You've sharpened a sense of sarcasm
you were born with it
but now it seems smarter - 
it surprises me often
and leaves me wondering
how can you be so wise, so soon?

If the me then could see the us now,
what would she think
not of the ways this road has traveled
not of how it has twisty-turned and over-corrected
not of the broken headlight
but of the wonder of this journey?

Sweet Russell Clark,
namesake of bravery and sorrow
image of your ancestors
trail blazer with open heart
you have so much color to give the world
and I can only witness you in Joy.

There is no thing you will be
Capable of pausing my love of you
Capable of distancing you from the Lord
Capable of deterring your true destiny - MIGHTY!
Capable of starting what was begun a decade ago
Thank you for being my boy.

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